We talk a lot about the right way to talk about money. After all, money is one of the hardest topics for people to talk about. But, what happens when you don’t have a good interaction around money? There are bound to be upsets in any relationship. (That’s true for other flashpoints in addition to money.)
So sometimes it’s good to review the larger topic of communication skills in relationships, thanks to our friend Dr. Susan Heitler, a Denver clinical psychologist and marriage counselor. Although she also tackles the central issue of money in relationships, she’s put together a great toolkit of articles on communication skills:
- Apology skills to be able to heal after stumbled into upsets
- Exit and re-entry routines for cooling down to prevent anger from escalating into fighting.
- Skills for disagreeing in an agreeable manner.
- Habits that infuse interactions with positive energy,
- Skills for listening responsively to each other’s concerns
- Ability to keep discussions on sensitive issues flowing collaboratively
- Shared decision-making skills.
As with Money Habitudes, there’s a focus here on understanding your own habits and attitudes – and those of your partner; self-assessment is a big part of why our money personality methodology works. There are practical tips to have good, healthy conversations. There’s also a focus on being proactive and not reactive – including learning communication skills and employing them early in a relationship. Also, there’s a sense of fun and lightness that’s especially evident in Heitler’s free online PowerOfTwoMarriage relationship quiz. It’s fast and easy – just like Money Habitudes!
Also, online relationship tests are top of mind for us as we’re working on that transition for Money Habitudes …