Studies show that money is the number one source of arguments for couples and those arguments are the best indicator of divorce. It is very important for couples to be able to understand and respect each other around the difficult topic of money and to be able to talk about the topic in a calm, healthy way. As a result, many marriage and relationship educators (MRE) use Money Habitudes cards because they:
- Are easy to learn and to teach as a facilitator — and the cards are simple enough that couples can do them on their own too.
- Show couples come that they have legitimate differences in how they view and use money; couples come to see each other’s perspective.
- Appeal to men and women because of their tactile, hands-on format and low-stress game-like feel; people associate cards with fun and being social.
- Provide couples with a common, non-threatening language to talk about money issues rather than resorting to destructive name-calling.
- Give couples a framework in which to share potential slights, miscommunications and money secrets in a constructive way.
- Allow couples to improve their communication and understanding elsewhere in their relationship because money touches on – and is often a proxy for – so many other important issues like power, love, control, freedom, status, generosity.
- Are a way to get couples to talk about finances and make joint financial decisions, leading them to manage their money better. This may mean feeling comfortable to make a budget, share duties like paying the bills or meeting with a financial planner.
- Build trust and understanding in relationships.
- Work across the spectrum of age, income and education.
- Complement other relationship skills programs (e.g., communication, conflict resolution, etc.) and can be used as an icebreaker, integrated module or standalone activity.
How it’s used
- Icebreaker or conversation starter. The cards are easy-to understand and non-threatening so people feel comfortable discussing money. This can be in a counseling, classroom or small-group format. Couples can also do the activity on their own.
- Workshops or seminars. Money Habitudes cards are a fun, insightful but low-risk way to engage people around the difficult but crucial topic of money. While the class may be a standalone, it is often included within a series that touches on other relationship skills and topics.
- Marriage mentors and marriage sponsors. The cards give marriage mentors a fun, easy way to work with engaged or newlywed couples around the topic of money, making the session more relaxed and interesting.
